Stories from…STEPS // Danielle
Danielle* shares her experience of taking part in the recent STEPS course.
My name is Danielle and I’m struggling with a fear of rejection.
Over the last year I’ve taken on more responsibilities both in and out of my workplace. This meant that I was expressing my opinion more openly, doing more public speaking, and working closely with senior leaders whom I had previously been intimidated by. I was feeling really exposed in these situations; pressured to succeed and impress others. I would often over-analyse everything, finding fault in everything I did and wondering what others thought of me. I feared rejection and so would overcompensate by being overly critical of myself. As a result I felt like I’d lost a sense of joy and was stuck in a downwards spiral of rejection. To be honest, I was skeptical that STEPS could help as I felt like I’d already tried everything.
However, during the course I gained a new clarity of thinking. Although you only speak for a short time during each session I found the preparation time during the week invaluable, which I was then able to vocalise. I learnt how trusting in God needed to play a pivotal part in my recovery, and to have more faith in him and myself.
There wasn’t a ‘light-bulb’ moment of dramatic revelation, but slowly and quietly I started thinking and feeling differently. Where before I used to dwell on situations and spend a lot of time worrying about what others thought of me, now I feel much freer and have more confidence to face difficult situations in my life.
*not her real name.